I found myself asking a friend two weeks ago.
Of why the opportunities came only now and not before, why now when I already had a concrete path to take, why make me choose between passion and a good salary?
I started this year with the gut feeling that it’s gonna be a great one. Remembering what my pastor preached years ago, when you confess you profess, I claimed it out loud.
It all started with a freelance gig, a job I thought that would only last for a week but life took it’s turn and it became a regular thing. The experience itself was already very fulfilling— I was able to explore various creative fields, put to use the rusted gears in my head and develop concepts, met people from all walks of life, dared leave my comfort zone and finally, for the first time in my life, risked my sanity by sharing my craft to the world and telling them it was me who made it and not anonymously.
Come the time that a professional career called to me, I was torn whether to pursue a dream or execute the (prior) plan (before everything, before said freelance).
It all came back to where I was before. When I chose a career path in college that my heart wasn’t in, back to last year when I finally quit it, back to a time where I wasn’t sure if there was even a future for me.
My culture (see Asian) values education very highly, parents pressure their children to get perfect grades and academic achievers are put on a pedestal.
The entire elementary and high school life, it was ingrained to me that an 85 is a no-no and that a 95 isn’t enough.
It took me an entire year to open up and say I couldn’t do it anymore, that my course wasn’t working for me. In my family if you don’t have a college degree, you get nowhere and people in general will think low of you.
The only consolation I had was that I have a very understanding mother. When I finally told her everything, told her how I felt…how I was lost, she tried her best to support my decision and get me back on track.
In the beginning of the year, I was presented with a project, to make a short film and during that time I knew it was a one-time thing. It became two, and now it’s on a regular occurrence.
A week ago we started a media “company”.
A few days ago, I was told to quit and establish a corporate career and that media would provide a no-good life for me.
This is the part where I started questioning why only now.
Why only present opportunities to me today and not back then when I didn’t have anything for the future? Why make me choose?
But I remembered my mantra: Everything happens for a reason.
I remembered a video I saw, she said that God doesn’t put you on situations you cannot handle. You are there for a reason. You are there because you can.
When I asked my friend that question, immediately I took it back. I told him that this must have been first of the blessing this year has in store for me. That it was okay despite my inner conflicts.
Because I would rather have opportunities come “late” than never at all.
Opportunities come to those who are prepared.
I am grateful for all of it.
I am very much grateful for a great year. I claim it and it will be.
☕️
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